2.19.2009

Remembering Colin

Today Colin would have been two. Sometimes I still can't believe that one of my friends has lost a child. It's every parent's worst nightmare, and it breaks my heart to know that someone I care so much about is living it. I went to see Beth for a little bit today, just to drop something off to let her know she is in my thoughts and prayers. I am aching for her, life isn't fair, and it would drive all of us crazy if we tried to make sense of it. When I went to say goodbye we had a good long hug, and it just broke my heart - here I am blessed to be expecting 2 more little boys which I can feel kicking inside of me, my tummy pressing into her as we embraced. Why can't she have just one? I would give anything in my power to bring back her son, but I know I can't. I'm so glad to have a hope beyond the here and now.
The kids came with me to bring balloons to his special stone. Dawson and Colin are only six weeks apart, and I am mindful of this all the time. I wish Beth and John could have the joy of watching their son grow, and I just pray their hearts can find some peace and healing.
Remembering you always Colin, but especially today....

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