I try to keep the potty talk on my blog to a minimum. And believe me, I have plenty of material, but I figure you'd rather I keep most of it to myself. But this was just too funny.
Dawson has "normal" nick names like Big D, Buddy - blah, blah, blah. But what some of you may not know is that he has a nick name that I've reserved for at-home use. I call him Tooter Extruder. He has the stinkiest buns in the universe so the name seemed like a good fit. I say "you-reek-a" when he releases this horrifying puff of disgusto into the air. But unlike Eureka, you-reek-a definitely does not mean we've struck gold, it means we are on the brink of death by suffocation. So, keep this in the back of your mind....
Ella started in on another line of questioning about Satan. I used to be a bit concerned about her curiosity about all things dark and twisty, but now I'm used to it and I just think it makes sense because she's sorta dark and twisty herself. So she wanted to know where he lived again and came up with her own answer. "Oh, so he lives really far away, like in Mexico." But Dawson chimed in with his own explanation that "God lives in yer heart, and Satan lives in yer butt crack." I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes.
Flash forward to later that evening. Dawson was up with us at about 10 pm. Charlie and Dawson have been terrible sleepers the past couple of weeks. Or is it a terrible non-sleeper if you don't sleep?...But that's another issue. So there he was sitting with us, releasing his weapon of mass destruction on us via his toxic gas. I started praying for us out loud as I sometimes do in these situations (this is probably blasphemous) something along the lines of "Dear Jesus, please protect us from this horrible smell, heal Dawson's bottom Lord..." And then Todd said "maybe Satan does live in Dawson's butt crack."
I'm still cracking up a day later:)

1 comment:
Too(t) FUNNY!!
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